The Magical Life Of The Morning Person

It's a little sad, but if I could change one thing about myself it would be to magically turn into a morning person. There was an article in the Evening Standard this week called, "Why Morning People Rule the World" and that pretty much says it all.

Also, my Dad thinks non-morning people are lazy. This article agreed. "Morning-ness is perceived as a sign of activity and zest, whereas evening-ness implies laziness and loafing," it explained.

But the article also stated that scientists have been able to prove that we don't have much choice over when we are awake – our genes dictate our natural propensity for being more alert at certain times of the day. Apparently we evolved this way so that there would always be someone awake to scope out danger, like rival tribes attacking or hungry stray coyotes. Unfortunately, these days, if you want to have a job, most are 9 to 5-ish – take it or leave it.

Thus, mornings are a dark time for me. I'm not really prone to depression (I'm more the anxious, paranoid, high-strung type), but I get a taste of what it might be like as I peel my body from the sheets and drag my corpse-like body into the shower. "I just can't go on like this," I think as I'm washing my hair. I've tried everything to make this process less painful and I just can't seem to, no matter what time I go to bed or how many pancake breakfasts I promise myself I'll make.

So what's a sluggish girl to do? First, there's coffee. I try to keep it to one in the morning and then tea or maybe soda for the post-lunch dip. My grandmother will be 94 this year and she drinks a reasonable amount of coffee. She's totally fine – and much sprightlier than me, I should add. She still does aerobics.

Second, I've learned to work with what I've got. I resisted this for a very long time. There were experiments with getting up early to write in the morning before work or trying to establish a morning meditation routine. As if. Morning meditation is just a good excuse for going back to sleep. Now I dismiss these silly ideas straight away. When I started thinking about when to write this blog, I conceded it would have to be after work or maybe during my lunch break.

Third, I am trying to get up at the same time (that ungodly hour of 7 a.m.) every day to at least have a routine, instead of convincing myself I can go back to sleep for just another five minutes about 20 times. And then I am extremely kind to myself about when I get to things in the morning. I don't do too much brain-powered work first thing as I ease into my day. I also don't eat right away – I'm just not hungry – no matter what those experts say about breakfast first thing. And I've started walking to the further train station so I have 25 minutes of sustained heart pumping blood around my body. I certainly don't walk fast – it's more like painful plodding – but by the time I get on the train I have started to feel less like a zombie.

I am still hoping that I will someday stumble on an article with a really good suggestion for how to change myself into a morning person without the aid of a fairy godmother (believe me, I have looked). There are still many mornings when I am able to convince myself that I can probably sleep until 8 a.m. and make it into work by 9 a.m., even though it takes me about an hour to get there. On those mornings, even if it is sub zero outside, my hair is dripping wet and probably I am not wearing matching socks.

I wonder if there are similar challenges for morning people. Personally I can't imagine them, but if you're a morning person, please do comment, I'd be quite interested to hear how your life is less magical than I think.