The Early Bird Catches The Worm

Our world is definitely skewed towards early risers. Work starts early in the morning for most people, and aren't there about a million expressions that equate to the early bird catches the worm?

I have never, ever liked getting out of bed in the morning. And for years I have pined after the dream of springing from under the covers with energy, excited to face the day. I've definitely come to terms with the fact that this will never happen. I've even read a whole book on chronotypes, hoping for some insight into how I could change my natural bio rhythm in some way. No chance.

Whatever your chronotype, whether it's a lark or owl, you're stuck. The good news is that the world is set in a normal distribution, meaning that very early larks or really late night owls are rare. But if you tend to be one of those people who sleeps in a little bit later on the weekend, you lean towards the owl side of things, and spend your weekdays living with "social" jet lag.

I'm not a really late person, but whenever I am on holiday I find myself staying up later and sleeping in later, until going back to work is exactly like having jet lag. I long for the day when I can set my own work and leisure schedule and get up at a time when I just wake up naturally. But let's face it, this situation is incredibly hard to come by. And it must be even worse for people who have kids. I really don't know how you do it.

But why is this so important to me now?

One of my goals for the year is to get into the daily writing habit. I've had a lot of success with writing first thing in the morning on the weekends, which is how I wrote the first draft of a book last year.

The problem is that when something goes wrong one week, like maybe I need to do my (paid) work on the weekends, that substantially affects my word count for the week.

I've experimented with writing after work, even for 30 minutes before bed, but it never seems to take hold. I'm just too mentally exhausted from the day. Or I'm out and about and don't really have time when I get home.

I realize that although I'm not a morning person, the reason writing first thing on the weekends works for me is that no matter what time I get up, it's the first thing I do (if you're curious, it varies, but on weekends I get up between 8 and 9, and am always writing by 9 if not earlier).

If it's done first thing it's a priority -- it's that simple. It's much harder for the day to get away from you, for unexpected things to crop up, or for someone to invite you out for a drink, for example (and clearly, I have a hard time saying no to this as the day progresses). I try to hit the most important (and usually hardest) thing at work first too. Doesn't always happen, but on the days it does I just feel so much more productive.

This brings us to weekday mornings. Is it possible that I could get writing before work?

For weeks last summer I tried. I really did. I even committed to texting my friend when I woke up, thinking this would do the trick. And it worked for a few days at a time, but then I would oversleep after a few successful days.

But I'm going to try again. And if it means getting into work slightly later, so be it. Luckily I have some flexibility with the hours I work.

What I'm hoping will make a difference this time is that I'm going to start with the bar very low. If I only write one day a week before work I will call it a success. And I'm not starting with Monday, but with Friday. Because then I can't say, "Oh, it's O.K., I'll just get up early tomorrow."

Yesterday -- on the first Friday -- I managed it. It was not a roaring success. I wrote 198 words in 30 minutes, contrasted with the 1,676 words I wrote in two hours this morning. Since you probably don't want to do the math yourself, this was 6.6 words a minute, compared with 9.3. So about 30% less efficient at 6.30 in the morning then when starting closer to 9 a.m.

The quality of those words? Now that's a harder analysis to do. But with first drafts does it really matter?

I'll keep you posted on my progress. In the meantime, let me know if you have ever tried to do the most important thing in the morning. And also, of course, if you're an owl or a lark!

Photo credit: Horned Lark, Fresno Cty, CA, 2005_03_25 (4 of 5).jpg via photopin (license)
Photo credit: Whoooo via photopin (license)

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Early Writings: Dear Diary

The annoying thing about writing is that you have to have something to say. 

Of course it helps to be able to have honed the skill of prose (and I'm not saying I have yet), because you can't get very far without that. But even though beautiful prose is a joy, I don't think it's what compels us to keep reading. It's the message, isn't it? You might say that it's also the story, but then again, aren't stories just messages about life, told in an entertaining, compelling manner?  

I've been pondering my own objectives as a wannabe writer as I make my way through the childhood boxes my parents sent over, as they contain 13 diaries, as well as a lot of my early writing attempts (just wait until you hear about the start of a novel called Thunder Under The Sun). But first, let's talk about my diaries. The first one, which I've already made my way through, was not long, but is equal parts funny and painful to read. Apart from the sheer cringe factor, it's incredibly difficult to observe the way in which I viewed our baffling world. Everything is black and white, and there's a sharpness in my environment that I couldn't quite understand due to, well, being a child (I'm almost eight in the first set of entries). But I suppose that's what also makes the entries funny. 

For example, I remembered when reading through the entries that it was at that age that my Mom had to be at work earlier than my Dad, so he used to get me ready to go to school. But there must have been mornings he couldn't, and it seems I went over to our neighbor's house on those days. It emerges that I have taken a real disliking to this arrangement. Why? My indignance at my friend's mom's insistence that I blow my nose (I will keep my grammar and spelling true to the diaries -- there's no messing with perfection): 

"I was unsure I wanted to go. We had brefast I tried not to exspress my feelings and I'm good at it but I had not wanted to go. So I went. Almost every munit she'd ask me to blow my nose I felt like she didn't like me. I was glad I left to go to school."

I'm sure our neighbor was glad when I left too -- who wants a snotty kid hanging around? And what a little stoic, good at not expressing my feelings. I feel like that might have been a tiny exaggeration on my side. 

Another interesting point from -- let's call it -- Volume 1, is the fact that my difficulties with mornings began at an early age. Most entries seem to begin with this irritating waking-up stuff. Even when friends were sleeping over:

"Heidi was sleeping over a I woke up when my mother woke me up. I was not awake Heidi and I where fast a sleep." 

I was a very tired girl, it would seem:

"today my mother woke me up (and I still feel tirad)"

Also, apparently I was interested in financial services from an early age:

"and then my father took me to the bank and the lumber yard and the amp [American supermarket chain A&P]. then we went home and I had ravioli and apple sauce and bread. then my father took me to his work. So I took along pick up sticks and a car and a ballet doll so I had fun exploring [large American financial institution] and Linc showed me how to put a tape in a computer."

It was the 1980s. Seems like work with Dad was much more fun than with Mom though. One entry ends with: 

"That night we went to a boring meeting." 

Clearly not as good as earlier in the day when I was making cookies, rollerskating and playing with dolles [sic] with a friend.

I'm pretty sure I didn't have much to say in my early journaling -- not that my lunch wasn't incredibly interesting -- but at least I was starting to exercise the observational muscle. 

Stay tuned, as I plan to keep exploring writing through the perspective of my early attempts at it. If I can stand continuing to read my "work". As I said before, the cringe factor is a strong one -- I may end up being pretty selective with what I reveal, as you can only imagine.

Related Posts:

• Mornings Sorted, Well, Sort Of
• Let's Keep Our Mind On The Prize

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Mornings Sorted, Well, Sort Of

If you have been reading this blog since it started (and thank you if you have), then you would be well aware of my issue with mornings. Sometimes I think if I met a genie, it might be one of my three wishes to become a morning person. But alas, I just do love those lie-ins and I am not the most, um, pleasant person in the morning.

Last June a great friend of mine who lives in California met me in New York for a trip. We shared a room each night and after a few days she revealed that she finally believed that I wasn't a morning person. She was also nice enough to shower first each day and give me those precious 15 minutes of extra sleep. (All the more impressive that she had the eastbound jetlag that should make it more difficult to rise in the morning.)

To be honest, I had just given up on mornings entirely. But then I realized there is one circumstance when I can rise early: when I have a lot of work to do.

Work has been very busy for me lately, which isn't actually a bad thing, as I've been given the opportunity to so some interesting things. But faced with the very real possibility of needing to stay late at the office most nights I decided that I'd prefer to rise right after the Hub in the early morning and just get going with my day.

There are certain interesting aspects to this new routine. Like the fact that commuting early and getting in before most colleagues actually allows my grumpiness to melt away faster since I don't need to talk to too many people and the commute is actually less stressful. I am also a surprisingly productive worker between the hours of 8 a.m. - 12 p.m. -- I can get more done in those four hours than I can get done during an equal amount of time in the afternoon.

The caveat is that I still can't rise early to do something fun at home -- sleep always wins -- so when I am getting up early it's got to be about inescapable work.

But what's most curious to me is the fact that better use of my mornings has been something I've wanted to change so badly about myself for a long time. And progress has been painfully slow. But when I really needed to change, it wasn't hard in the slightest: I just did it. Perhaps there's a lesson in that?

Related Posts:

• The Magical Life Of The Morning Person
• Trial And Error

 

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Balance: Not A 'Nice To Have'

Balance is essential. When I began thinking about this month's word – balance – as part of the Self-Discovery Word by Word series, I couldn't think of a metaphor. Until I realized it was staring me right in the face – it's one of the reasons that I actually started this blog.

When I was suffering with extreme pain in my arms and neck (what is typically called RSI), what I was really suffering from was a muscle imbalance. So even the name told me that it was a lack of balance causing me pain.

My problem was caused by poor posture – some muscles being too strong and others not enough. My entire body was out of whack (if you're interested in all the gory details, read The Whole Story).

So balance is necessary for the body, but it's also key for the mind. And that's because, to me, balance is all about sustainability. When I think about making any change in my life, I always ask myself if it is sustainable. The Hub was laughing at me the other night as I told him I needed to start getting up at 6.30 a.m. again when we were back from our vacation (I have been pretty relaxed about mornings lately and for various reasons need to shape up a bit). He said that I'm always saying that, but when he leaves for work in the morning I'm still snoring away.

Fair point. But 6.30 a.m., I know I can do, 6 a.m. – not so much. Any earlier than 6.30 a.m. and I crash and burn later in the week. It's not really sustainable.

It's like with exercise. In January, my Bikram yoga studio was so packed – even on a Sunday afternoon – that it was hard to move. Such was the crush of people wanting to get in shape and excise the demons of the Christmas period.

The New Year's resolution pack doesn't really get it. Since October, I've been going to yoga once per week without fail (except for once or twice). And I'm pretty sure I've clocked up more hours than those people who attend class three times per week for the first few weeks of the year, only to get burned out and lose interest.

Once a week doesn't seem like much, but over time it can make a difference to your life. And you can build up from there – I've now started practicing twice a week. And it seemed like a natural progression, not something I was forcing myself to do.

Balance is the middle ground. It's not the ideal and it's not total chaos. For me, there can be a lot of unhappiness in stretching for the ideal. I try every day to remember that it's better to get something done, instead of doing it perfectly.

There are, however, times when your life isn't balanced. Sometimes you don't have a choice. There are people who need to give up whole food groups due to a food allergy. Or when you have a newborn, there's not a lot of time for anything else. There are people who find themselves in a work situation where there isn't an immediate way out and they have to devote a lot more time and energy to that than they'd like. And when I had so much pain in my arms and hands that I could barely type or pick things up, I couldn't really opt out of doing physio exercises for nearly an hour a day.

But realizing that there are times when balance will be impossible should make it all the more imperative to try to practice it now. And it's not a 'nice to have' – it's a necessity. Because otherwise how can you manage everything in life (your house, your body, your food, your schedule, your relationships) without going berserk? You can try to live in the middle ground – where life is sustainable. Because ironically, with sustainability, usually comes change and growth.

This post was part of this month’s Self-Discovery Word by Word Series. To find out more, or to participate, click here to read Myrite at Tasty Life's kick-off post.

 Related Posts:

• Beauty: Owning It
• Bravery: A Little Every Day
• Anger: A Warning Sign 

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Trial And Error

 If you've been reading my blog from the beginning or at least over the past few months, you would be familiar with my morning struggles. To summarize, I'd like to be a morning person. They seem more productive and happy or something. But I'm not.

So over the past year I've been attempting to either try to become one or at least get up a little earlier in order to give myself some extra time to do the things I like to do, or at least not arrive at the office late and in shambles and feeling guilty (which happens a lot).

Growth and change are never linear. When I set out to 'fix' my posture/RSI problems, things would improve, and then they wouldn't for a long time. Sometimes I would feel like I was moving backwards.

Changing anything usually involves a lot of mistakes. And so has been my challenge with mornings. I've tried to bribe myself to get up earlier (pizza for breakfast anyone?), commit publicly to getting up earlier, spend the early mornings at home hanging out doing stuff, spend the early mornings at work doing stuff. I've made lovely breakfasts, bribed myself with cream cheese, eggs, bacon, etc. (the food list goes on and on), tried meditating early in the morning, writing in the morning, doing absolutely nothing in the morning except giving myself more time to get ready and last but not least, putting my blackberry in the living room in the hope that I would at least get out of bed to check my email.

Well, I've learned a few things.

First, I'm not sure if this is ever going to change, but the absolute earliest I can get up, without thoughts of ending my life (I'm only partly joking) is 6.30 a.m. For some reason, that half hour between 6 and 6.30 is a real necessity for me. And don't give me the whole have-you-tried-going-to-bed-earlier? speech. I've tried for a year. A year. I give up on 6 a.m. Also, even if I can get up at 6.30 a.m. most days of the week, there's always going to be one or two where I need to sleep until 7 a.m. I haven't been able to prevent this.

Second, my body is not ready for breakfast right away. It takes me at least until 8 a.m. if not 9 a.m. to be ready to eat. It's just the way my body is and I'm going to accept it.

And third, being creative isn't happening in the morning. I can get up successfully at 6.30 a.m., get into work a little early and answer emails or do admin, but I'm not ready for writing or anything of the sort.

But there's also some good news: I've realized that the morning walk I started doing a year ago in the summer when we moved into our new flat was really the happiest morning activity I've ever engaged in. So I've re-instituted it. I don't know what it is, maybe it wakes me up, or cheers me up. But whatever the reason, it works. I just go to the train station that is a 25-minute walk from our house (instead of the one 10 minutes away). I sometimes even do it on the way home as well. Hey, when you sit at a desk all day, some light walking isn't going to hurt. It also gives me time to think and be alone, which I love. We'll see if I'm so enthusiastic in the winter months.

I don't know if this is the end of the morning story, but I think I've settled on a happy medium. Maybe I'm not a morning person, or will never be one, but through trial and error I've at least discovered a few things about myself that help me to navigate the mornings OK and at the very least I'm late for work less often.

P.S. The most ironic thing about this is that if you read my first post on this subject, The Magical Life Of The Morning Person, I already knew a lot of what I discovered this past year, which means maybe I need to trust myself more. Although I seem to have at least programmed myself to get up some days half an hour earlier than before, so that's some progress!

Related Posts:

• I'll Never Be A Morning Person, But...
• Jekyll And Hyde
• Making Morning Space

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Making Morning Space

As you may or may not have noticed, I took last week off from blogging. Wasn't intentional, but last weekend we were in New York partying it up pre-wedding. And then, back to work, dealing with jet lag and a pile of work to tackle after being on vacation for (gasp!) two weeks straight. Blogging just wasn't in the cards.

Plus we're gearing up for the stretch of time right before the wedding when things really need to get sorted out, so I'm kind of busy panicking.

However, I have made some progress on the morning front! I thought I'd share, because you all know how much I have struggled with this. It's probably too early to even talk about because I've had a lot of false starts before, but as is always the case, I am hoping that this time is different.

Here's my new approach. In the past, I was trying to get up earlier to get something done. Most recently writing. However, I think this may have been where I was going wrong. This past week (and mind you, I was jetlagged) I started getting up earlier but avoided doing anything more than I typically do before work – you know the drill: shower, dressing, eating, getting to work. This week I just gave myself more space and time. Time to actually put on makeup, time to make a nice breakfast, and an actual feasible time for commuting.

The results were astounding. Not faced with a new task to get done but just more time to enjoy getting ready in the morning and subsequently not feeling rushed and panicky has done wonders for my mood in the morning. I'm getting into work before 9 a.m. – instead of wondering how late I'm actually going to be that day.

And because I don't feel rushed or stressed I am not so devastated when I don't get a seat on the train or the tube. I'm even feeling like I'm more productive at work because I don't start the day feeling behind.

One of my issues – I believe – is that my stress over needing to be more productive is actually detrimental. Because I'm always trying to 'do' so much, I don't have time to just 'be' and that, counterintuitive as it may be, actually impedes creativity and productivity.

Perhaps – and one can always hope – that this time I have it cracked. I spend so much time trying to be something else, someone better, someone more interesting and more productive. Maybe for me the morning isn't a time to get more done, but a time for me to just let things go and make more space for being.

Again, as usual, I'm worried this is the millionth false start. But I'll keep you posted.

Related Posts:

• The Magical Life Of The Morning Person
• I'll Never Be A Morning Person, But...
• Jekyll And Hyde

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Friday Find: Joy In Just One New Year's Resolution?

This year I'm going to make just one New Year's resolution. I don't think making a laundry list of everything you want to change and feeling overwhelmed really gets you anywhere – besides, so many of things I am trying to work on (writing, de-cluttering, post-injury exercise, becoming a morning person) I'm already attempting (some more successfully than others) on a daily basis.

I'm not the only one thinking in this direction. I've read a certain number of blog posts recently about having a one-word theme for resolutions, most recently Gretchen Rubin's (of The Happiness Project) article in the Huffington Post on choosing a theme for 2011.

Also, it got me thinking... could a New Year's resolution be something more fun? It doesn't have to be about trying to be more perfect and eliminating what we perceive as our shortcomings. I'm starting to think more along the lines of mapping out something I'd really like to do, that I'd regret not enjoying during my lifetime. Perhaps New Year's resolutions can be more about joy and less about drudgery.

So what's my one New Year's resolution? Music.

I've written before a little about how music has fallen by the wayside a bit for me over the years. Although I generally know what's going on in the pop world, at least, sometimes I feel like my music collection is a frozen relic from my college years (which actually is no longer very recent). Much of my life is word-based. From writing for both work and fun, to watching movies, plays and TV programs, I am incredibly verbally focused, and I think I need a break from that.

I enjoy music. And listening to music uses a different side of the brain. Language uses the left side of our brain while music and art are centered in our right. Which means that while listening to music, the overactive reasoning side of my brain can have a little rest. Which is good for everyone around me too.

It's a good time for me to get back into knowing what's going on in music – we need to decide on all the music elements of the wedding over the next few months, from the ceremony to the DJ's play list. And one of these days, I'm going to get back to playing the piano. Although maybe that's reserved for next year's resolution.

Happy New Year!

Related Posts:

• Tir Na Nog
• Jekyll And Hyde 

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Jekyll And Hyde

I am really struggling with the mornings, my friends. Here's the situation. I want to get up early in the morning. I want to have more time to spend reading other people's blogs and writing my own. I yearn for that feeling of being organized when I'm actually on time for work and have not been rushing around like an out-of-control freight train trying to decide what to wear and what I need to remember to bring into work for the day.

I'd like to have a leisurely cup of tea in the morning. Or actually wear make-up to work.

At bed time I'm an in-control Dr. Jekyll, calmly planning to rise at 6.30 a.m. (I know, it's not even that early!). In the morning, I'm a monstrous Mr. Hyde, plotting how I can stay in bed just one more second, and thinking that actually I can get ready for work in 15 minutes! And who needs clean hair? Or breakfast?

How can I deal with these two competing sides of my personality? How can I motivate myself to do what I really want to do without letting myself get in the way?

I thought I had it cracked for a while (see I'll Never Be a Morning Person, But). Doing something I liked in the morning (like writing) was helping a lot. But then the going got tough. All I needed to keep my bum in bed was a super busy week at work or something I was upset about.

I know many of you have given me suggestions before, but please, reiterate or give me more. I'm not a big fan of fighting natural tendencies, but I know that if I had better mornings I'd probably have better days.

Perhaps I should try the whole 'publicly pledging to do something', so I'm held accountable. Who knows if this will work with Mr. Hyde at play, but it's worth a shot.

6.30 a.m. on weekdays or bust. Any other ideas, please do send them over.

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I'll Never Be A Morning Person, But…

I am pretty sure I'll never be a morning person (see my post The Magical Life Of The Morning Person). But I am still trying to get up earlier. And I think I've stumbled on the secret: you have to have something to get up for.

After all, there are many parents out there who aren't morning people. But guess what? They have to get out of bed to make sure their children are fed, dressed and generally not neglected. Maybe they don't like it, but they have decided that having children – and happy healthy ones at that – is important to them. They also probably can't sleep through all the wailing.

In recent weeks I've determined that my days aren't exactly long enough. I can't do everything I want to do, plus my full-time job and also write this blog. So I'm attempting to get up 30 minutes earlier than my usual wake-up time. Not incredibly ambitious, but still, it's a big deal for me.

I'm not springing from bed at 6.30 a.m. (quite the contrary), but in the back of my mind I know that I want to get up to have some more time to work on the blog – and it makes me happy to be writing something that's not related to my day job.

Second, I tell myself is that I am not going to feel any better getting up 30 minutes later. And it's true – anytime before 9 a.m. is like hell to me, so even if I were to sleep for another hour, I'm not going to jump out of bed singing and dancing.

And third, there's the promise of Saturday and Sunday and wonderful lazy sleeping in.

But it's still early days. I've had false starts with these sorts of experiments before. I'll keep you posted. In the meantime, any other suggestions for effective ways to get up earlier?

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Silly Stress

Although life can be wonderful at times, it also has the habit of being incredibly messy and stressful. People get sick, hearts get broken and jobs end. Much of life is utterly uncontrollable and sometimes you just have to sit there in your little rubber life raft trying not to fall off while the waves keep on knocking you around and sometimes even crashing over your head.

However. There are some bits of life where stress can be avoided. Hey, sometimes we even go so far as to create the stress ourselves. I like to call this silly stress.

Recently I stumbled on two areas of this in my own life. I'll share them with you – even though it's somewhat weirdly personal (don't worry, it's not about underwear). Maybe it might help you to have a think, be your own expert, and see if there's any silly stress you can strip away from your own life.

There is some silly stress in my day-to-day life that I can't quite figure out an easy answer to. In this category falls my problem with mornings (see my post The Magical Life Of The Morning Person). I just know if I could get going earlier and be at my desk before 9 a.m., I'd be a much calmer sort of Snow White-singing-with-the-forest-animals sort of lady. But alas, I've worked hard on that one and it's still a work in progress.

But I've recently realized that opening my wallet to find it devoid of cash except for some pennies and a Croatian coin of some unknown value makes me really stressed. I know with debit cards (particularly with the PIN system in the UK) we don't really need much cash anymore. But having cash makes things easier. Whether it's trying to split a bill without waiting for 10 people to enter their PIN numbers at a restaurant, or taking a taxi home from central London late at night without having to face the rigmarole of asking the driver to find a cash machine while he looks at you with dagger eyes, it's just less stressful to have the cash on you. And there's always that situation where you are having your friend's parents over for dinner and the running water is turned off (due to some electricity outage in London) AND the minced beef you were going to use has turned a dark shade of brown. So you have to order out food from the Korean barbeque place instead. It's just nice to have the cash to pay for it so you don't have the embarrassment of borrowing the money from one of your guests. It's silly, I know, but it's still stress.

So now when I see my cash is running a bit low, I just go to a cash machine and take out more money than I think I actually need for the rest of the week or whatever. It makes me feel happy and prepared (I'm so sad, I know). Please don't come and rob me though, because in England it's harder to get a gun so I'd probably fight back. Because of my small size I could get you around the knees and knock you off your center of gravity.

The other thing I've noticed is that I cause myself no end of stress by deciding what to wear to parties, events, weekend barbeques, etc. only 30 minutes or so before it's time to leave.

Then, when I'm putting on the fabulous outfit I've assembled (in my mind of course), I suddenly I realize it has been eaten into rags by giant moths over the winter or it doesn't fit or it actually makes me look like a 12-year-old (I kid you not – a very unsuccessful H&M buy – I must have been running a fever that day).

These clothing try-on situations have been made even worse recently because of the unusually hot summer in England. Usually my clothing choices don't vary much from season to season here, but this year it's not been necessary to wear tights or scarves in the summer, so I've been thrown into a panic over all wardrobe choices, especially with all the impromptu barbeques people have been throwing.

A few weeks ago for one of these said barbeques, I decided to actually assemble my outfit shortly after I got up in the morning, when I was just putting my clothes on for the day. It involved just as much teeth gnashing and wailing, and I even got Future Hub involved in all the fun action, but when the decision had been made, I took the clothes off, folded them up and put them on the bed for later when I would get ready to go.

It was bliss. When I left the house, I was on time, relaxed and actually remembered everything I had to bring. A much better state of mind to arrive at a party, I must say.

So there you go, silly, but hopefully helpful in some way. I didn't really set out to change either of these things but for some reason the hardest part was actually recognizing that something was causing me stress. Fixing them was the easy part.

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The Magical Life Of The Morning Person

It's a little sad, but if I could change one thing about myself it would be to magically turn into a morning person. There was an article in the Evening Standard this week called, "Why Morning People Rule the World" and that pretty much says it all.

Also, my Dad thinks non-morning people are lazy. This article agreed. "Morning-ness is perceived as a sign of activity and zest, whereas evening-ness implies laziness and loafing," it explained.

But the article also stated that scientists have been able to prove that we don't have much choice over when we are awake – our genes dictate our natural propensity for being more alert at certain times of the day. Apparently we evolved this way so that there would always be someone awake to scope out danger, like rival tribes attacking or hungry stray coyotes. Unfortunately, these days, if you want to have a job, most are 9 to 5-ish – take it or leave it.

Thus, mornings are a dark time for me. I'm not really prone to depression (I'm more the anxious, paranoid, high-strung type), but I get a taste of what it might be like as I peel my body from the sheets and drag my corpse-like body into the shower. "I just can't go on like this," I think as I'm washing my hair. I've tried everything to make this process less painful and I just can't seem to, no matter what time I go to bed or how many pancake breakfasts I promise myself I'll make.

So what's a sluggish girl to do? First, there's coffee. I try to keep it to one in the morning and then tea or maybe soda for the post-lunch dip. My grandmother will be 94 this year and she drinks a reasonable amount of coffee. She's totally fine – and much sprightlier than me, I should add. She still does aerobics.

Second, I've learned to work with what I've got. I resisted this for a very long time. There were experiments with getting up early to write in the morning before work or trying to establish a morning meditation routine. As if. Morning meditation is just a good excuse for going back to sleep. Now I dismiss these silly ideas straight away. When I started thinking about when to write this blog, I conceded it would have to be after work or maybe during my lunch break.

Third, I am trying to get up at the same time (that ungodly hour of 7 a.m.) every day to at least have a routine, instead of convincing myself I can go back to sleep for just another five minutes about 20 times. And then I am extremely kind to myself about when I get to things in the morning. I don't do too much brain-powered work first thing as I ease into my day. I also don't eat right away – I'm just not hungry – no matter what those experts say about breakfast first thing. And I've started walking to the further train station so I have 25 minutes of sustained heart pumping blood around my body. I certainly don't walk fast – it's more like painful plodding – but by the time I get on the train I have started to feel less like a zombie.

I am still hoping that I will someday stumble on an article with a really good suggestion for how to change myself into a morning person without the aid of a fairy godmother (believe me, I have looked). There are still many mornings when I am able to convince myself that I can probably sleep until 8 a.m. and make it into work by 9 a.m., even though it takes me about an hour to get there. On those mornings, even if it is sub zero outside, my hair is dripping wet and probably I am not wearing matching socks.

I wonder if there are similar challenges for morning people. Personally I can't imagine them, but if you're a morning person, please do comment, I'd be quite interested to hear how your life is less magical than I think.

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